My house in Aberdeen WA
I've been busy these last two weeks sorting the house and preparing for Operation ReSell in January. I need to know where all my inventory is (aka - everywhere) and how I'm going to tackle a too busy life starting January 3rd. I've finally organized most of my crafts in my office but I still have 6 boxes of crafty items in our hallway to organize and put away. Yesterday when I was going through a box I came across a journal of mine from 1995/1996. It was the year leading up to meeting Dave.
Overall it's the saddest journal ever. Every page is full of loneliness, frustration and even desperation. IT was such a dark time for me. When I read through the book it is like I am reading someone else's story, or maybe even a fictional book that I picked up at a rummage sale. I found myself rooting for the character at times and then realized with a broken heart that this was me. It's a shadow of who I am today. A person I would never, ever want to go back to.
I wrote this in Aberdeen, WA on January 9th, 1996:
"Today wasn't much better. I almost drove into someone while leaving work. Yikes. I was all pumped up with tons of energy upon returning from San Francisco yet now it's dissolving into the typical laziness of me. I didn't accomplish much this evening. I sort of cleaned off my desk, I made homemade chips, made my lunch for tomorrow; nothing that stands out and says, "this woman tried to save the world." Not that I want that but I want something so that I can go to sleep each night with something accomplished. Looking in boxes upstairs in my attic I see that my great grandmother was in the newspaper all the time for her poetry and my grandmother was in the paper for her dancing. I realize that we all have an impact on the world and some are made known more than others, but I want to be one of those. I wish to be in the media. I know that sounds silly, but so I am. I need an outlet for my talents. I need to discover this outlet in this lifetime. Every person in some way or the other has their own little shelf, filled with little books containing protectively their talents. My mother has some filled with numbers and electronics while my father has ones full of history and construction. What does mine have? Perhaps it currently has a draped sheet across it, like a house waiting for it's occupants to arrive home from vacation. It is only a matter of time I suppose. I must find the patience that I find in my strength and through my strength I must find the motivation to push myself into my hobbies. Talent doesn't usually arrive Federal Express. At least not for me."
Me in at my job at the cemetery with two of my co-workers.
The next entry was on January 20th. To me, this if the first hint and inkling of Apron Thrift Girl:
"Hello, well I haven't a novel to add to my shelf but I have two ideas that I shall attempt to pursue. The first is the most exciting. I am going to start an attic and garage cleaning service for people. I shall get a business license and everything. I'm considering the title Earthenne's Attic & Garage Cleaning Service. I intend to recycle everything, hence the name. It actually means something to do with dirt but it has the word Earth in it. I want to save stuff from going to the landfills and help people clean at the same time. I'm just starting with the idea so I'll have to get back to you on it. My other idea is to have a support group or meetings to do with the Tightwad Gazette. I've found my motivation and I have to grab the reins and steer it in it's onward direction."
I never did get this business off the ground in Aberdeen Washington. Two months and 10 days later I met Dave in Chicago and my life changed forever. A year later to the date I married him at our first of two weddings.
When I arrived in England as a young bride I was still lost but lost in a different culture and country. If I thought I was eccentric and creative in the states I was pretty much crazy to the English. I did find myself obsessed with DIY TV though and a show called Change That. TV designers would take a piece of furniture that an audience member would bring them and they would change it into something better. Basic RePurposing.
It's funny to reflect back on the small things that made me who I am today. I began ATG 10 years after I wrote the journal entry about cleaning attics & garages. I didn't know at that point that rummaging through attics and garages would become my work and passion in life. My personal highlight of this week (besides the children on Christmas morning) wasn't the gifts under the tree but the surprise estate sale that I went to yesterday.
My ReSelling job is kind of odd and hard to describe to people sometimes. It's doesn't necessarily hold a fancy title but I love my work. I love finding treasures in dusty boxes, I love recycling people's unwanted items, I love repurposing things and I love the high of finding a hidden gem like sterling or gold.
I keep wanting to be a designer, artist, writer, actress and a million other things that interest me (currently I want to learn French and figure out how to do encaustics) but at the end of the day my skills and passion have to do with Thrifting. Even when I try to veer away from it and pretend I'm an artist, I always fall back on ReSelling because I love it and I can make money at it. To me, it simply comes naturally.
The point of this post is hopefully to inspire you to really try to understand your passions and find what you are good at. Uncover that passion and see if you can find a business or work that feeds your soul. I imagine if the internet was in full swing in 1996 like it is today I would not have struggled so much. The day I discovered blogs that mentioned thrifting was the day I started Apron Thrift Girl. I'd even guess it was probably not even an hour later that I signed up to Typepad and named my blog. It was through my blog that I really made ReSelling my career and passion. Thrifting does feed my soul and while it's not the job that I ever imagined having, it's what I'm excited about every day of my life. I hope that you too can find something that motivates you each morning. Life is too short to miss something as important as passion in our lives.
Where is your passion and how can you make 2011 the year for making it your life?