Apron Thrift Girl

Christmas Wishes

2012 has been the most challenging and incredible year of my life. I've been reflecting back a year ago to Christmas 2011. I will admit that I wasn't very happy with myself. It was my 39th Christmas and I suppose I was wrestling with the fear of reaching age 40 and being disappointed with my life. I know that sounds a bit harsh but that was where my mind was.

I wanted to reach my birthday in April and well I guess feel happy and content. I mean that is what many of us are searching for in life. January 2012 arrived and I knew that I had to make changes. I was slightly overweight and I felt like I was in my late 40's health wise. Right before I went up to Washington in February to see my mother who was sick I made a headstrong decision to change my diet.

Now as many of you know, I eat an overall organic wholefoods diet. But I still had many "healthy" processed foods in my meals and I was addicted to gluten free chocolate chip cookies. For some reason soon turning 40 gave me the determination to stop eating this way. I cleared out the cupboards of anything processed food (for the most part) and anything with ingredients that didn't include whole foods.I wanted to pronounce everything that went into my body which mean reading every food label.

I followed many of the food suggestions from Mark Hyman's books and began to eat nutrient dense foods like avocados, olives, smoothies, and quinoa. I continued to drink my cold press coffee with half and half because I didn't want to feel deprived. The second I feel deprived I start devouring cupcakes and frosting by the truckload.

I also began an intimate relationship with my treadmill. I am not a fan of exercising. I find it incredibly dull and soul sucking. So I started listening to podcast about health and this changed my perception of exercise. I actually looked forward to working out.

The numbers on the scale began to fall.

Yet what I noticed from my change in diet was something that I never expected.

I began to feel younger.

And I went from being an introvert to being able to actually talk to people. And not only talk to them but throw in some wit for good measure. My overall shyness dissipated.

April 17th arrived, I turned 40 and I felt incredible. Just like I had wished to feel back in January. I had lost probably 10 or so pounds, was feeling like I was in my 30's and I had the ability to communicate with strangers on a level that I had never experienced before.

Not only that, but my brain changed. I was suddenly able to retain information better. Names of people that I would meet, stuck. With all of these processed foods gone from my diet, it was as if my brain was cleaner and could work properly.

Summer was still very hard with my mother passing. I experienced a depression which took some time to lift.

Through the year there were new friendships created that I couldn't have survived the year without.

I lost over 20 pounds in all which is a lot to a 5'1" size body. I have practically replaced every piece of clothing in my closet with newly thrifted smaller clothes. My two favorite consignment stores for my new wardrobe are Launch in Sebastopol and Zoe and Kids Exchange in Petaluma. For the first time ever, I can actually wear Anthropologie brands that fit well. It was very strange to discover this alternative style of clothing six years ago only to have a body that couldn't fit in them properly. And I'll even admit that gaining the weight was worth it because now I can really appreciate my smaller body. Really, really appreciate what I have. I still have some pounds to lose and work to do which I'll start on in January. The key to my diet was not feeling restricted. I never ate less food. In fact, sometimes I felt that I ate more food, it was just healthier, nutrient dense food.

What I also learned this year is the power of your mind. I truly set my goal on being healthier and this gave me the will power to change everything. And when you change your life, it sets all of these ripples in motion. I lost weight, felt healthier, my self esteem raised, I attracted the right people into my life and my business took off in directions that I never thought possible.

I've shared on ATG for years the power of wishes. I so believe in not only making wishes, but believing in them and making them your reality. In January when Dave asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I answered "a house." We received the keys the day after my birthday in April. It is amazing what you can achieve in your life when you wish for it.

On that magical note, I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. I can't wait for 2013. I have so many plans for my ReSelling business, for this blog and for you. It's going to be an incredible year and I look forward to sharing it all with you.

eBay Radio Guest

Mod Girl 25¢ from a Yard Sale on Saturday

It has been an exciting week.

• Monday I started to organize my inventory. After 3 months of summer this is key to my business for a successful fall. Without organization I tend to get overwhelmed rather than efficient. I now have a box next to my computer with inventory that has been photographed. It's always full and I can list an item when I have a few minutes spare.
• After getting some positive feedback about this idea on ATG Facebook, I've decided to host a 2nd ReSellers Thrifting Challenge. It's going to begin October 1st. This will help us stock our stores, get auctions listed and prepare us for the holiday selling season.

• Do you remember when I found this tiny painting at an estate sale last spring? I finally listed it yesterday. It sold within a few hours for $275.
• The last thing that has made my week very exciting was being invited to be a guest on eBay Radio. The very thought was nerve-wracking and before and after the interview, I wanted to throw up, but the next day I realized how much I loved talking about my passion. I usually love writing about it and not talking in public about. Radio is lovely though and I adored talking with Griff and Lee. Maybe this will get me going on doing a podcast or two. Here's the link to my interview. Oh and the first part, I was a frazzled mess, talking too quick and trying to find my words. Thankfully I warmed up by the end.

I'll be sending out more details about October's ReSeller's Challenge next week. Have a great Thrifting weekend.

Updates

Keiran & Cerys starting 3rd & 6th grade. Keiran excited and Cerys excited but trying to remain cool and aloof for the camera.

In June I read this passage in the book by Laura Day "How to Rule the World From Your Couch."

"Depression is rampant in our society and it is often because we have a lot to do and not enough time to do it. We never feel complete. There is always something missing, something off. When our needs, dreams and goals aren't met because you are exhausted and, therefore, not functioning effectively, you can either be downtrodden or, as I would like to argue, decide to live more effectively. You receive so much media "input" (to add to the influence of your history, parents, peer group, and community) about what you should want and who you should be, that it distracts you from getting what you really want, believe and value. When you turn back inside and know what you really value and want, you get it. you cannot move in a hundred directions with success, but you can move in one powerful, single, integrated direction and fill a hundred needs effectively. When you put all of these intuitive skills together, that is exactly what you will be doing. Your health will help your relationship will create pleasure will create wealth will create community will create......."

The first part of this was me in a nut shell. I filled every minute of my life with things to do. I took on more when my schedule was already brimming over. Deadlines came and went and there were times when I went to the bedroom and just escaped in a book because I couldn't handle the pressure.

I tried moving in every direction possible but never seemed successful in anything. That's how I felt looking out at the world. And Facebook reminded me of how many people were succeeding while I seemed to be frozen in my inability to do anything.

So I slammed on the brakes and took a step back. Then jumped back a few more steps until I could breath again.

I virtually stopped writing this blog, I stopped Little Shop, I stopped Etsy, I began to say no when people asked me to do something and I started to notice something.

My brain became silent.

There wasn't an ongoing noise of what I must do, need to do, what to next write or take photos of. It was still and quiet for the first time in months, possibly years.

I stepped into summer without weights on my shoulders. I spent time with my children, I read books and magazines, we swam, we rode our bicycles, we looked at real estate, we went to a hundred thrift stores, we played and we learned about how to live without Dave working from home. We became a unit rather than them trying to get my attention while I chained myself to the computer.

We had our down moments when the children wouldn't help me in the house. I had to go old-school and put everyone on a strict schedule. Once there was rhythm in the home, they helped me and did their chores. We all became more relaxed because of this.

The irony of my summer is now that I had so much free time and a quiet brain, I really didn't accomplish anything on my list. I didn't do steampunk crafts, didn't craft at all, I didn't host craft days like I had promised and I didn't clean out the garage.

Yet I look back on my summer and I feel so much happiness that I was able to work and spend time with the children. The hard work I started in February with the Listing Challenge paid off all the way until the middle of August when sales started to slow down. I listed in the morning before the children woke. I used the eBay app during the day when I could list things very quickly. I packaged in the late afternoon. It worked! I was able to juggle working and being a mom.

My August book sales were over $1800. My eBay sales were around $800. Yet, in all actuality I worked so little that earning any money was a huge positive.

ReSelling gave me this freedom to work hard in the school year and take it easy in the summer. During our vacation I was able to turn off my store and yet thrifted inventory while away.

I can't say it loud enough or often enough how much I love my job.

Oh sure, I'll watch American Pickers with a little jealousy that they are able to just sit back while people contact them with items to sell. Or drive all over the country thrifting. Or having 2 stores where people flock just because they want to be there. I want all that. But for now, I'm content with raising two children and working my dream job. Maybe later will come the other part of the dream where I have a store and a van that takes me to different states to thrift.

Where does this "taking a step back" leave me now that school has begun?

I'm not really sure. I'm going to try my best to keep Thrift Share Monday going strong. I'm going to work on writing an eBook on ReSelling. I'm going to try to do short posts during the week.

With all of this in mind, what would you most like to see here?

• Quick posts on items to look for to ReSell?

• Short posts with ReSelling tips?

• Tidbits on buying?

• Funny videos about cats. just kidding.

Let me know. Share with me what you miss, what you long for and what you are craving.

finding my apron again

Apron Thrift Girl became the name for my blog nearly 5 years ago because I fell in love with my little 1927 cottage.  When I moved into our vintage home I was drawn to aprons like a moth to a flame. I couldn't get enough of them. Soon enough I had around 60 aprons and a blog that was growing and changing.

I don't really collect aprons any more although I'll buy one from time to time. I'm still fond of them and love the collection that I have. My favorite is one from the World's Fair in Seattle.

During the last year and a half I've worn my apron a handful of times. Up until last Friday, Dave worked from home and tended to work strange hours in order to take advantage of the time difference between California and England. He'd awake around 5 a.m. to go to work and stepped out of his home office around 4 p.m. He took over making dinner, washing dishes and doing the laundry while I focused more time on my blog and ReSelling business. We fell into a wonderful and comfortable routine.

Life became challenging right before Christmas last year. We lost our financial security, our lives became stressful and we had no idea when things would get better. The day after Dave received some challenging news regarding his job, our second car was rear ended and considered "totaled". Christmas was difficult especially since we didn't want to spend the money to travel north to where my family was spending the holiday. We had never experienced such a stressful time as that December and January. Yet for Dave and I, we became closer and our family became stronger. Losing our corgi in March hurt more than anything. We still carried on though. We stayed close.

It's times like this that you question why life is leading you down such a path of loss. Yet in some ways maybe it was just part of our life's journey. That's what we tried to tell each other. Often.

Today Dave starts his new job in the city. He'll work Monday through Friday in San Francisco and he'll have an office on Market Street. He'll once again have co-workers, meetings (in person rather than conference calls), an office and thankfully for our family; a good salary with fabulous benefits. There are even company events that include families.

I'm so happy for him and relieved. A part of me is sad though. 15 years on I'm still head over heels in love with the man. I'm a little heartbroken that most of my day will be without him. And I'm sad that he'll arrive home after the children and I have had dinner. We gain so much with this new job and yet we lose so much too.

I'm trying to be strong but during the last week I've had a roller coaster of emotions. Yesterday was my first day alone in the home. He was at a training day in the East Bay. I kept busy and when Cerys and Keiran arrived home I tied my apron strings around my waist and once again became the mom that made them snacks, cooked them dinner, encouraged Cerys's cello music and washed the dishes. It felt oddly familiar and yet still in a way; strange.

I feel a little numb at the moment and unsure about how to cope with the next 15 years or so. I know that millions of people work out of the home. I just became spoiled during the last 8 years of seeing so much of my husband. I'm blessed that we both raised Keiran from a year and a half to present day. Dave was able to attend so many school events and concerts. He was able to take Cerys to her cello lessons on Tuesday evenings. He was really able to be a hands on father.

Balance is something that I'm going to need to focus on. My work day hours have been cut short. My weekends will include less thrifting because our time together as a family will be so much more precious. I've already dusted off my Nest Planner and have began meal plans and writing up shopping lists. I had to stop at the grocery store after dropping the children off at school which is something that I never do. So many little changes. My life was already very full before this change. I'm guessing something will have to give but I haven't decided what to let go of.

We've decided that my ReSelling will pay for the Waldorf school so that I have a financial goal to aim for every month. Anything extra will go into our House Fund or back into the business. I'm going to reconfigure ATG and see if I can come up with more ways to make it pay for itself. I love this blog but with my free time being cut, something has to change. If you have any ideas I'd love to hear them. You can email me through the Contact tab at the top.

It's important more than ever that I stick to my new ReSelling goals where I sell higher end items rather focusing on small items. I'm feeling very optimistic that it will work. The key with all of this though is balance, balance and balance.

I'd love to hear your favorite tip for finding balance in your life.

sprinting to my goal

This morning greeted me with an energy that left me humming in the kitchen as I prepared breakfast. Okay so maybe I was singing loudly but it was with excitement that stemmed from yesterday's Dream Share post.

What I really want to share with you today is that dreaming isn't always about achieving your dream. It's about the path that you take while getting there. It's what shakes up your life and brings opportunities that you might not have discovered if you hadn't created a dream to reach for.

I know a few of you were mentioning about the fact that my dream house has only 2 bedroom. I appreciate your honest thoughts on the house. I later mentioned in the comments that MLS listings have to state what the house was legally designed to have. What the listing didn't mention is the fact that there is a sun room, office and a media room. At the end of the day the house is so incredible that we would make do. I found the layout to the house yesterday afternoon.

What have I done since yesterday to get me closer to my dream? I'm clearing out the clutter in my home. I want all the small bits and bobs of vintage stuff to go out to the garage. I need my mind clear in order to plan how to make this large amount of money in a time before the house sells. And if I don't make it, that's okay. There will be another house and another dream. This energy and excitement though is worth its weight in gold. You can't bottle it or sell it in a capsule form, it only comes from the pure joy of life.

Maybe to kick mine into gear I needed a goal so huge that it got me thinking in all sorts of directions that I never would have thought about. I asked Cerys this morning how to achieve my goal. She said that I need to do art. And with just one word, my mind was reeling in another direction. I asked her how much would I have to charge per art piece. She said $5,000. So I'd need to sell 200 pieces to get a million dollars. While it may sound far fetched, it's turning ideas and creating numbers out of them. Selling 200 pieces of art for $5,000 could be doable. I mean if a Kyle could trade a red paperclip for a house why couldn't I sell 200 pieces of art for $5,000. The only reason I couldn't is that I wouldn't have belief in myself. Anything is really possible in our world. Look at the guy who sold pixels for 1 million dollars.

How does this relate to thrifting?

Who is to say that I already don't have something in my possession that is worth a million dollars. Whose to say that you don't? The only thing really stopping us from that idea is thinking that we don't. Right?

This is why I want to clear out the small stuff that I know isn't worth a lot of money. I'll price it for my yard sale and flea market or store it away for Etsy at a later date. At this point I have too much inventory including mysterious items to really understand what I have.

This bird is something that I bought a year or so ago. I've asked around on Facebook and possibly here on ATG but so far I don't have an answer about what it is. It's a little primitive and made in a very old style of using charcoal as the base for the sculpture. It's somewhat in the style of Celtic, maybe from Hungary? It could be very old or it could be a trinket that someone bought on their travels recently for 10¢. The thing is that I don't know. I have countless items like this just sitting in my house or garage. In fact I have another similar piece that I searched for today and couldn't find. My goal is to uncover these mysterious items and find out what they are and if they have any value to them.

I won a free appraisal from WorthPoint a couple months ago. I didn't have the energy at that point to find something worth researching. They ask for information about the item and photos. Finally yesterday I emailed and asked if I could still send them information on an item. They enthusiastically said yes. I sent them the info this morning and am waiting to hear back.

I'll be okay if it is a modern day trinket but the feeling I have right now of it possibly being more is very exciting. This priceless feeling is going to be the fuel to get me to my goal of owning a fabulous home.

I've been going through the house and listing items that I love on eBay. I'm throwing them up for high prices (although not ridiculously high compared to their value) and will see what happens.

We opened up a new family checking account at Wells Fargo and we are finally leaving Chase (aka Wamu). We are going to open up a savings account for both children and a House Savings Fund account for our next home. I can't wait to start adding to it.

I'm going to be printing off photos of 885 Montgomery Road in Sebastopol and placing them on my dream board in my office. Even if I don't buy this house what I will achieve is a clean, organized home and a focused business model that should give me more time and hopefully less work for more money.

If you have items that might be worth money, here are some ideas of how to find out their value:

• take them to a local antique store and ask if they know about the item
• apply to be on Antiques Roadshow
• apply to be on Pawn Stars
• take your item to a local auction house. Larger auction houses often have free appraisal days.
• visit the library and search for your item in the large collection of antique reference books
• visit forums in the area of your item (pottery, marbles, books) and ask questions and include photos
• post your photo on ATG's Facebook page and ask if anyone knows what the item is.

Do you own something that you thrifted that could be worth thousands of dollars?

Keeping the Castle

I used to think that I knew everything.

I'm not sure how many years it took me to realize that I was just silly. Of course I didn't know everything.

When I was doing home organizing I used a crown for my theme and claimed that I could help make my clients the queen of their castle and that they could have it all. You know motherhood, a home business and a clean house. I'm sure some do but I don't think I could ever personally lay claim to that. I guess at one point maybe I did do it all. I certainly try to have it all now but there are some days where I simply give up, fetch a glass of ice tea and go lay out in the warm sunshine.

Our family life may change a bit in the next few weeks. In preparation for this I am trying to get things together.  Here are some of the things I'm doing:

• finding my menu forms so that I can start planning meals again
• analyzing the structure of my business (oh yes, once again)
• moving more things out to the garage until I can better deal with them
• Spring Cleaning and getting rid of both personal items and inventory
• listing to Pandora
• wishing that I had more leftover cake
• pricing lots of items for either our yard sale or a future flea market
• searching for a way to find $1.2 million so that I can buy this house

With possible changes ahead I just am feeling a mix of being rather anxious. When I'm anxious I clean, sort, purge and make sure I'm content with the direction of my life.

So that's what I'm doing today.

Now for some sunshine.

xoxo Selena

saying goodbye

I've lost count of the days and months since we first placed out Cherry Avenue home on the market. It's now been 7 days since we closed, 7 days since we stopped owning our home and 7 days since we lost our originally invested $90,000. Okay so that kind of hurts but it's time to say goodbye to our home and to our money.

The first emotions that we had were relief that this extra financial burden has disappeared. Every month our renter paid us $1600 and every month we gave the bank $2600. Then there were the unexpected plumbing issues which cost us money. We never had planned for the house to be a rental. Shortly after we moved to California in 2009, it was set to close. 10 days before closing the buyers simply changed their minds.

My relief on selling the house has slowly dissipated into grief. As we walk away from this we can't help but feel that we have lost a lot.

The one shining star in all of this was our realtor Sarah Sydor who works with Windemere on Bainbridge Island. We found her after I sent a "help us find a realtor" post on a local Island Moms email group. We felt so helpless down here. I had asked for a realtor that was internet savvy, someone that would actually communicate with us and someone who would help us sell our house. So many moms referred Sarah to us.

She not only became our realtor but she became a close friend. She went above and beyond for us with selling the house and closing the deal. Her fabulous husband was even helping out right before closing by mowing our lawn (in the rain) as per the buyer's request. Without Sarah I don't know if we could have managed through this somewhat painful and emotional real estate transaction. There were times when she gave us the advice that we needed to hear. We had absolute trust in her and she really came through to the very end.

Since we lost all of our investment we aren't sure if we can buy another house again. When I am feeling positive I think that money is just an energy and that it can come as easily as it disappears. When I am feeling depressed I find the situation heart breaking and it leaves me grieving.

Thankfully we are content in our current rental. Yet that self-sufficient upbringing that my parents gave me leaves me wishing for land to grow our own vegetables and plant our fruit trees. I long to drink from well water instead of city water. I wish to hear the sounds of nature rather than the sounds of leaf blowers in our neighborhood. I look forward to driving through countryside to a Waldorf school rather than on the freeway every morning at 65 mph.

I'm praying that the difficulties of the last four months will slowly shift gears into positives. Our house has sold, we are now once again a 2 car family, I'm bringing in money with ReSelling and Dave has lots of possible job opportunities in the works. How will we make up for the $90,000 lost? I'm not sure. It would be somewhat doable if we didn't have school fees to contend with but for our family, Waldorf education is our top priority, next is our organic wholefoods diet and third is our home. Our main reason for Frugality is that we can have those three items in our lives. Where we spend money is actually the future. We spend money on the children's education because I want them to graduate feeling confident in who they are and knowing that they can do anything they want. I feed them a nutrient rich, organic diet to hopefully keep them healthy when they are older.

Many houses in Sonoma County in the area where we want to live are $400,000 and up. We are prepared in our minds to invest in a home that needs work as long as it has good bones. We don't actually enjoy turn-key homes because we want an older home (now 50's or 60's rather than the 20's like our Cherry Ave home) that has some vintage character in it. Nothing breaks my heart more than walking into a vintage home where it has been modernized. We'd actually love our 1950's rental house if we could only pick it up and drop it in the country somewhere.

I wish that thrifting was predictable and that I could plan to buy a $5 painting that was worth $100,000. We've all read the stories where someone picks up something for nothing and sells it for a large amount.

I'm going to start dreaming and planning how I could earn or bring in money for our down payment of our next home. I'm so ready to set down roots and have space for the children to build forts and tree houses. My first task will be to write up a list of ways to find increments of money. Some will be silly and crazy but how else do amazing dreams come true? It was only through dreaming that we came to live in Sonoma County. I dreamed about living here when Cerys was just a year old.

I love this quote by Wayne Dyer: "In order to float an idea into your reality, you must be willing to do a somersault into the inconceivable and land on your feet, contemplating what you want instead of what you don’t have."

I'm going to contemplate finding the money for us to make a down payment on our next house. I'm starting tomorrow by opening a Dream Home savings account at my bank. I'm also going to write down ways to earn and make money. I'm especially going to find even more ways to save money. We spent more than normal during the last week between my birthday and our little vacation. Now it's time to tighten our belts and watch our savings account grow. We may be starting over but it will be our hard work, dedication to our dream and our strong power of wishing that helps make our dream of once again owning a house a reality.

networking your dreams

Did you happen to read some of the comments from Wednesday's post?

I've thought non-stop about them since they began arriving into my in-box. I had emotions of sadness when I read that people felt it was "too late" to try something. I smiled at many of them and nodded my head in agreement too. I wrote to Antonia and told her that I was coming with her as she travelled across Europe. And Harper's dreams left me with tears in my eyes at the beauty of her honesty and desires. I also felt a bit helpless because you left all of your dreams and I didn't know how to help you.

I'm a stubborn girl on the best of days and sometimes I blindly head straight first into my dreams causing a bit of havoc in my wake. Sometimes I dream, go after it and then later realize that it might not have been the best decision. I don't regret those moments because it's the going after them that makes some of them come true. We moved to California to send our children to our "dream" Waldorf school against all odds. Now those odds have left us challenged and more vulnerable than ever but my daughter (especially) needed to be at this school at the start of 4th grade. She arrived barely reading, she didn't understand math and couldn't even tell me what coins were in her hands. Chasing the dream to be here is probably the best decision that we have ever made in our life.

I realize that I have somewhat failed on the Trade Me Up campaign. It seemed doomed before I even got it off the ground. My friend Amy (who was going to help me) started a new job (which is fabulous news for her), then the earthquake in Japan hit, then Elffin died and I just couldn't get the motivation to start it again. It began though with me sharing some of my dreams. I just wanted to trade up for them and see if somehow I could connect with someone that might help me.

That got me thinking about the fact that we'd achieve so many more of our dreams if we shared them allowed. How many dreams do you have that you've never shared with another person? What if instead of asking a person "How are you today?" we'd instead ask "What dreams can I help you achieve?"

What if instead of networking our business as many people do, we networked our dreams. We'd share our dreams and listen to others about their dreams with the goal of wanting to help each other.

As an example a couple of you mentioned that you wish you could write books. When I read those comments I had thoughts go through my head on how to help you move in that direction. These are some of them:

• for those wanting to write children's books try to join your local Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators. If you have the extra money - go to a conference.
• Learn everything there is to writing a book by going to the library and checking out the book Writer's Market which is filled with publishers and magazine information. It is a wealth of information.
• Take a local writing class.
• Join or start a writer's critique group.
• Spend one afternoon a month at the library with pen & paper or laptop and use that time to write an outline, brainstorm, illustrate or just practice writing anything that comes to mind.
• Tell friends and acquaintances that you wish to write a book. Don't put yourself down when you tell them but share your dream in a positive fashion. Listen to what people say to you. They may offer free advice, suggestions or put you touch with someone that might help you achieve your dream.

If you really want something then there is really nothing stopping you from at least learning more information about what you wish for.

To those wanting to be graphic designers. Start small. I'm not brilliant at understanding the programs needed to do graphic design but I've finally got to the point where I can make a banner, create buttons and play around with photography. There is nothing stopping you from creating and sharing what you love to do. People will most likely notice and seek you out to create something for them. They might start to pay you as you become more experienced. Perhaps you can trade for an hour of an experienced graphic designers time to teach you some basics. Money doesn't even have to be exchanged if you have something to offer them.

What do you think about creating another Sharing opportunity here at Apron Thrift Girl?

What if every month I created a Dream Share post. I would share some of my dreams. We can create a link share and readers can go to your blog and read about your dreams. It would be fabulous if not only you read the dreams that someone would write but you could possible offer advice or offer them a way to get closer to their dreams.

Do you think this could work? Would you be comfortable enough with writing your dreams in your blog? Would you visit other blogs in the Sharing links and see if you can help them? The point of this would be to help, share and give. To really make this work though it does need participation.

I'd love to hear your thoughts about this. I just felt so inspired after Wednesday and I would love for that inspiration to continue every week. I feel blessed that so many of my dreams in life have been accomplished and I'd love for others to feel that way too.

xoxo Selena

Barbara Sher & a Book Giveaway

I Could Do Anything by Barbara Sher

It's still a relatively strange concept to hold conversations with my children that are on a deeper level than discussing toys, early childhood concepts and diapers. Four years ago I thought only about having more children. That very thought consumed every bit of me. I just wanted to experience pregnancy, birth, babies, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, toddlers and preschool over and over again. Four years later I'm the mother of an 8 and 11 year old and I'm actually enjoying the next stage of parenting and especially a full nights sleep. I love talking to my children and hearing their thoughts on the world as they grow older.

Keiran at the moment is obsessed about owning a Ferrari. I'll blame Dave for introducing him but Keiran's passion for cars is probably one part to do with him and another part to do with his grandfather who loves anything that moves including trains, boats, trolleys and cars. Keiran has also told me that he's going to be a professional football (English Soccer) player because they earn millions and that would give him enough money to buy a Ferrari and possibly a Bugatti.

When Keiran was younger and told us that he wanted to go to Mars we never disagreed with him telling him that he was silly. We'd always encourage his wishes and desires. Sometimes we'd chime in that he'd have to do a lot of training for space travel but we wouldn't dampen the conversation by telling him that no one has ever been to Mars. Of course as stubborn as that sweet boy is, he'd probably tell us that he'd be the first one on Mars.

Do you have mentors? I do, quite a few and most of them have no idea that I consider them a mentor. The on-line dictionary states that a mentor is: a wise and trusted counselor or teacher. I look at people who have changed my thinking and therefor changed my life as my mentors.

Barbara Sher taught me that it was okay to be passionate about thrifting. She even taught me that it was okay to take a course in French if I wanted and never speak another word of it. My personality is drawn toward experiences rather than necessarily learning things. My brain isn't a sponge that takes in details about many things and keeps it there. It takes it in and kicks it back out. I have trouble even reading instructions because it's just not written in a language that I can comprehend. It makes my head spin.

I struggle with facts about history, science, math and any other subject that is written in a factual way. I can read a magazine article today but only retain a whisper of the facts. Yet as I read it I do feel inspired by the words if it is something that interest me. Right now I'm reading from the current issue of Modernism Magazine about the Kaufmann family. The article fascinates me as I read it but what will I retain? Probably enough to use for ReSelling but nothing more. In fact, part of the reason that I am intrigued by the article is that I sold a book on the Kaufmann House in Palm Springs for over a hundred dollars.

I used to think that I was stupid because my brain didn't seem to work like anyone elses. One of my older brothers seems to read things and retain every single word. Why couldn't I do that? I grew up in a school system meant for children who could memorize text and use that for test and quizzes. Anyone who appeared a dreamer didn't fit in. I know that I certainly didn't.

It was only after marriage to someone who loved every last bit of me that helped me start to feel good about myself. He seemed to think that my clumsiness was sweet and that when I messed up expressions such as "a dozen a dime" was endearing. He didn't judge me but instead simply loved me. This was something that my 12 years of education never offered me.

Barbara Sher's book "Refuse to Choose" was the last step to truly accepting me for who I am. I forgave myself for being eccentric, odd, silly, energetic and a person whose brain appeared to work differently than most everyone that I knew. Not only did I offer forgiveness but I was finally able to embrace my personality. The same one that was not accepted by my schoolmates, sometimes my family and definitely not by ex-boyfriends (the ones who would roll their eyes at me).

When I discovered Barbara Sher and Refuse to Choose it made me realize that I wasn't alone, that there were many people like me struggling through life and that I can do anything that I want to do. That's when my life started to really click. I gave into my passion of thrifting, my blog took off in ways that I never expected and people began to look at me as an expert in all things thrifty. While I was a little shocked and surprised it also began to feel natural. I loved what I was doing.

Barbara says in the book "I Could Do Anything":

"I'm convinced that if you don't know what you want, something is stopping you from knowing it. Something - a hidden resistance - is making you hesitate to find your true desire and go after it. Positive thinking alone will never take you past this buried obstacle; pretending nothing is wrong won't get you anywhere either."

It took me years to learn that thrifting was my passion. I mean how odd a passion to buy something something that someone didn't want? When I came to terms and accepted thrifting as my passion, that was the point that I started to make money doing it. That is the beauty of passion when you start doing what's in your heart and money follows rather than chasing the money first and then trying to find passion in what you are doing. Believe me I've tried many jobs and crafts chasing passion that in the end fizzled away to nothing. We can look at my blog Flavorstitch as the perfect example. Yet I wouldn't change a thing because it brought me back to Apron Thrift Girl with more passion than ever.

The book, "I Could Do Anything, If I Only Knew What It Was" is a book on how to discover what you really want and how to get it. I picked up the book at a yard sale so it is used but I want to give it to one of you. If you are struggling with finding your passion than this might be the book to help you on the right path. As humans we are so passionate and we need to find out what makes our soul sing and our heart beat faster.

I want to hear about your dreams. What would you do if you could choose anything? It can be wild and crazy as you'd like. Leave a comment and a week from now I'll announce the winner on Facebook.

pausing

Have you ever wanted to grab the tv remote and use it for real life? Sometimes I visually look at the children when they are fighting and want to push mute button for just a few minutes. During fabulous moments I want to hit rewind and feel the sensation of the excitement over and over again. Right this moment I am torn between wanting to fast forward so that my heart wouldn't feel so empty without our corgi and also in a way I want to hit the pause button and just take a large breath in.

Just reading all of your comments during the last two days (huge thanks and hugs) showed me that not only have so many of you lost pets but some have lost them recently. I'm always amazed at how connected we all are.

The day Elffie died I couldn't stand to be in my office. I tried to go in there a few times but I just kept bringing up his photos on my blog and reading posts about him. I was crying non-stop. I left my office and started to clean. I didn't want to erase his memory but every time I would see a sign of him my heart dropped. I cleaned and I cleaned and I cleaned. Grief is such a strange thing.

It reminded me that it has been months since I have cleaned. It reminded me that I have once again forgotten to appreciate what I have in my life; Dave, Cerys, Keiran and Sydney our cat. It reminded me to s.l.o.w. down.

I admit I get very obsessed about things whether it is the blog or ReSelling or cleaning. Right now I'm full on ReSelling and I am finding it hard to slow down.

If you are have a scanner personality probably a lot of what I am writing is familiar. We survive on passion and we follow that passion until we are burned out or the passion dissipates. Then we head in a different direction to catch that feeling of newness and excitement. It reminds me of my little food blog Flavorstitch. I loved creating the name, designing it and playing food blogger. I loved attending the Food Blogger conference but when it came down to writing about food my passion for it eventually fizzled away. I have this beautiful blog but no motivation to do anything with it. I guess that lesson is okay because leaning over in the direction of food blogging made me realize that I am 150% thrift in what I want to write, what I want to do in life and what I want to teach and share with people. Leaving ATG briefly while I was seduced by writing about food was so good for me. It showed me where my true passion lies.

With that said, I have a lot of guilt with it just sitting there. Anyone want to barter for a fully designed food blog? I think I'm ready to realize it just isn't me. I'm ready to let go.

That's what life is about though isn't it?

It's also about constant reflection on your life to know what is working and what isn't working. Right now I can feel with every emotional part of me that I need to let go of things. I'm so behind.

When I was 8 years old I screwed up at the bowling alley. I rolled my second ball while the pin-taker-off thingy was down and it froze up the machine. Instead of asking for help I went and hid in the little arcade area. I can still picture myself slinking away and hiding under the pinball machine trying to escape my troubles.

I feel like doing that in a way. I want to hid from all of those unanswered emails that I seem to only think about at 3am every night, run away from all the things that I promised people, stop answering the phone and remind myself that there are only 24 hours in a day.

If this post seems familiar it probably is. My life seems to ebb and flow with doing too much and then needing to step back until I can regroup. I do this over and over again. Each time I do this though I learn something about myself and about my life. Right now I look at around at the untidy house and I just want it all clean and organized. I look at my in-box of unanswered emails and I want to find the time to answer them all. I look at my family saddened with grief and I want to take them away somewhere for a long weekend, albeit a frugal one.

I'm going to write down the things that I want to do in my life such as parenting, blogging and ReSelling and figure out the things that I need to let go of in order to do these well.

What do you do when you feel an imbalance?

Do you write lists?

Do you take off for the weekend?

How do you restore a calm back in your life?

Thank you once again for all your comments and emails regarding Elffin. Dave and I read each one of them through teary eyes. They meant so much to us.